SEXPLICIT… Get in here ladies.

Doing Marriage by The Book

SEX!!! Such a wonderful gift from God. Like a friend of mine would say, it is an act of worship. And truly, I do believe it is because in the OT, after they had brought their sacrifices, they were required to have sex with the temple prostitutes. So yes, it is a form of worship too.
Sex is a topic we are all interested in. Most of us may enter under a rock when it comes to talking about it but we think it a lot and that happens even from a young age. If you are not interested in it, darling, you may need to go for deliverance. Because sex is a sole creation of our Father in heaven and He put the desires in us therefore it is a good and perfect gift too. But as with other creations of God, there is a prescription and if we…

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I recently meet an interesting case some few days ago ,a 16 year old girl(name and identity withheld) and her guardian came in with a few days old baby,just on approaching into the consulting room,i could sense the intense tension between the two women,they had brought in the baby for medical attention,her little skull was a bit swollen at the base of the head,inflamed and painful..although the baby remained calm,but it was quite obvious something was wrong with her health..then my inquiring started..when i was not making any sense with the  story i was given, i had to excuse the guardian,and decided to have a one on one with my teenage patient…this was her story..
My mother died when i was very young, my father became very irresponsible,he refused to pay for my school fees,or leave money down for food at home,so last year at SS1(High school 10th grade)i dropped out of school and joined a local table tennis club.”i am very good at playing table tennis” ,she explained further,”i was almost at the semifinal league at my club,when i got pregnant….”she added
so i asked her,who was aware of your pregnancy?…she replied.”nobody ma”,i hid the pregnancy for 9month,in my father house,no one noticed i was pregnant’ i didn’t go to any hospital,i rarely felt ill,i was always with a bag that covered my stomach,
what about your dad?siblings?relatives?neighbor?
my dad didn’t notice,he left in the morning and came back late.,
so how and where did you have your baby i asked further?
in my room,by my self..that morning i had slight pain,like menstrual pain,because i didn’t want anyone to know,i locked my self in the room,and i got the urge to push,the baby came out on the floor.i pulled out the robe(cord)and manage to keep the baby in a nylon bag,and passed out…
my dad came in the night,needed my attention and kept knocking my room,when i wont answer he broke in and saw me in the pool of my blood,i was rushed to nearby hospital with the baby…jvbn
i was speechless for few secs,looking at her crying out her eyes quietly.
A lot was running through my mind,as i tried to comport my self to attend to her and her baby,
who could i blame for this?her dad?her late mum?her self? or the society?
why is she crying i though to my self?is it the pain of almost killing her child?or the fact that she didn’t die that day?or the pain of not having a mother?or the boyfriend who left her alone pregnant?or the fear of the future/dreams being over?or shame?….let me stop my story here…mbn
Too many things have gone wrong and is going wrong everyday in our society,TEENAGERS when you are not guided you are prone to many mistakes.
I get to see and hear lots of mind blowing stories especially about teens,these stories keep me motivated  to do what i do,which is…trying to inspire greatness in you.
Perhaps i could touch just one teenager or a parent by using this story to share some tips that could be life changing..klo
Listen up teenagers,you may never find yourself in this exact story i shared,but there are going to be situations you will find yourself,that will question your value system and your would face inevitable life issues and challenges that will test what and who you have been listening to,what you have already programmed inside your heart….Experiences that would shake up what your real beliefs are will come…  uuty
when it does,what will be the quality of your decisions?
If the girl in my story knew better maybe she would have acted cannot give what you don’t have
Its rather unfortunate that teenagers allow just about anything enter into their mind,via what they see,ear,watch and even eat or drink.erotic songs/series which triggers premature romantic feelings that blurs their values system unconsciously.
No wonder some adolescent still end up making very poor choices after all said and done.jklo
Have you refused to have sex simply because you feel you are young and not ready or is the choice based on the fact that you fear God,love him and you want to honor his word by waiting till marriage?.
your real reason will be tested…aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
‘Guard your heart with all diligent out of it flows the issue of life’prov4:23
FACT 101:love is a lot different from how it is being portrayed in the Mexican soaps and romantic movies/novels you invest and soak your mind in.
Esau found himself under intense pressure of hunger,he was not able to make a sound decision as he taught selling his birthright was perfect for him,and he payed for it.
don’t make a rash decision because of how you feel,don’t drop out of school,or give up on your self because your academics is poorly melting down.
what are you selling for few minutes of pleasure?
when pressure comes,what is inside of you will show..what is your value system?what will you refuse to do no matter what?
how will you behave and react in a worse case scenario?
Are there certain things you will not do in respective of whether or not your parent is present with you?nut
when your parent cannot afford somethings for you how do you react?
what is the reason behind everything you do or you don’t do?Are you just waiting for time and chance or you are fully persuaded and convinced.twq
Are you already day dreaming about your wild adventure when you get into the university?Are you pretending to be so spiritual to gain approval while you battle with secrets sins..?
A value system without God in it..will meltdown at the face of pressure and produce poor choices
Dear parents how much have you invested in your child?how much does your teenager know?have you shared your mistakes/life lessons with them,or have you left them to figure out life for themselves?
fathers can your teenage son confide in you?have you made you communication channel so open that your daughter can discuss her crushes/infatuations with you.vdteydjufugbnhjiuu
if you had too be away from the picture of their lives by any cause..what legacy have you left?if your children had to leave home at any age,have you influenced them enough to stand strong,and live by a good value system whose foundation is rock solid and influenced by the word of
Teenagers take a stand for right living,stand  for the holiness,in the face of fire like the young Hebrew men,don’t bend! don’t bow! wont be burnt!,
like Joseph leave your coat if need be and run away to your future.
stand with God.Jesus loves you.
Thank you for taking out few minutes of your time to read this,i urge you to share this to others as well,
God bless you.
AN healthy teenager will produce an healthy adult who will become an asset to GOD and GENERATIONS.
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A secret is an adjective, which means to keep hidden or to withhold information from others.
Some secrets are very harmful and destructive when kept hidden from loved ones especially your parents. Having secrets is widespread among teenagers, especially girls. But teens who share their secrets in confidence with parents and loved ones have fewer headaches and depressed moods and are more confident in social situations than others who keep secrets to themselves, according to a report in the medical Journal of Adolescence.


Sometimes you tell yourself that you are on top of a situation, but majority of the time it escalates and blow up on your face bringing huge embarrassment to you and those who love you, at other times when you even succeed at hiding these secrets, it hunts you and causes more fatal consequences in  your future.ddddddddddddddThis post is aimed at helping us teenagers (I CHOOSE TO BE ONE TODAY) highlight just few points of such harmful secrets capable of destroying our future.

Please, feel free to add other secrets you would advised other teenagers not to keep.


If you have ever been assaulted, raped, sexually abused or molested in any way or form, either by a close relative, a neighbor, a friend, a teacher, etc, even if it was when you were a child, or even now that you are a teenager…please find strength to tell your parent.yyyyy

I would agree with you that some of our parents are not as patient, or are too busy to be sensitive to us when we seek audience with them. However, if you are in this position, then I would further advice you summon courage to confide in a trusted adult.sss


Any form of sexual abuse has deteriorating psychological effect on an individual, some begin to manifest later in life,in form of depression, low self esteem, marital/relationship problems,the list goes on…zzzzzzzzzz

There is therapy in opening up, it helps destroy the grip of fear or guilt this sexual abuse has had or is having over you, which has been empowered by the secrecy…bbbbbbbbbb

even the bible says the “truth will sets you free”.

Get freedom, don’t suffer in silence. It was never your fault you were abused ,and no one has the right to abuse you sexually.
If the abuse is still going on, it can be stopped. It’s never late.



bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbAs we grow into adolescence, several changes begin to take place in our body, due to hormonal changes.
Hormones are chemical substances that stimulate reactions and trigger growth in the body. The male sex hormone is known as testosterone. The female sex hormones are estrogen and progesterone. In both guys and girls, these hormones are produced by the pituitary gland, a tiny pea-sized gland located in the base of the brain.aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

Puberty is the period of growth from childhood to adulthood; it is during this time that people become physically able to produce children. Individuals going through puberty experience LOTS of changes, physically, socially, mentally, and emotionally. So what is it that causes all these crazy changes in your body?..HORMONES!xxxxxxxxxfor example;
Girls begin to change physically,with the developments of breasts, accumulation of fats around the waist, commencement of menstruation, etc and for the boys – development of broader chest, deepening of voice , growth of hairs under armpits, genital region..Etc.hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
I must say here it’s quite normal to begin to notice a pretty girl in your class and a cute boy that stays down the street, but how you manage this phase is very important, you need to be guided so as not to act on this feelings of attraction which could be very misleading.zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
I can imagine you giggling reading this, say doc!, ‘ how can I tell my father who is a pastor that I am beginning to get attracted to the new boy in my class’…lol(lots of laughter)
It was not that easy for me as well, thank God I had a teenage counselor in church then who helped me clarify what I was feeling, I was then made to know the difference between having a crush, and being in love and how to manage it.  I was helped to channelize my raw hormonal energy into something more constructive, I was able to redirect and focus on my priorities which was my academics at that time.
More importantly, I also got real support to withstand the pressure not to date that early from the lord. With time, the crush I had died a natural death like it always does..

What if I kept quiet and remain confused, the crush could have developed into a full fleshed lust and I might have made lots of mistakes, maybe I won’t be here now trying to inspire greatness in you.219554df5336330bab69c04e19e01186_f1316
So guys, i know it’s embarrassing, but you must summon the courage to talk to a trusted adult whose lifestyle conforms to that of Christ, even if you can’t bring yourself to tell your parents.
For parent reading this, let’s try to always keep the channel of communication open..It’s an art we must all learn and develop. It’s better they learn from you than their peers.

If peradventure, you get pregnant as a teenager or you impregnated a girl please don’t hide it from your parent.ccccccccccccc A lot of teens because of fear and shame,  don’t tell their parent. They go in for the next convenient option, which is abortion-taking a life that you have not created.
Many have died and ended their life’s journey prematurely causing heartaches for loved ones.

Read this news- a story from Ghana about a 14 years old who died after an abortion.

Abortion poses a lot of threat to your child bearing abilities in future,  it also causes infections, gives a lot of guilt and depressive feelings .The devil capitalizes on the guilt to make it difficult for you to accept forgiveness and have a strong intimate relationship with God.aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
There are people out there, who will take advantage of your naivety, to destroy what’s left of your innocence, and thrive on your ignorance.
No matter how far you have fallen, God can still forgive you and give you a second chance.qqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqqq

If you are having problems in your academics, and not coping well in school
Or you are not happy in your current class, even when you are having good grades .e.g. you love art class but you are in the science class because you don’t want to let down your parents’ dreams of you being an aeronautic engineer.uuuuuuu
Discuss with your parents, if you feel they won’t understand you or criticize you, get your teachers involved..
Don’t study a course for the happiness of your parent, find out what you like to do, get your parents involved and go for it.

If you have any kind of addiction, like masturbation, pornography, alcoholism, smoking, sexting, stealing.Etc speak out!!!

I know telling your parents some of these will really upset them, so try confiding in a trusted person, like your pastor, a big brother or sister figure(they would direct you to right place to find help),counselor
Know that your parent care about you and they can’t disown you,they love you so much,even when you don’t get along with them,never forget they have your interest at heart.mmmmmmmmmm
I hope no parent will yell or beat-up his or her teenage child for confiding in them about any addiction  they have. That’s why we encourage every parent to try to be well informed about normal trends of teenagers ,you can only know this by talking with them.imagesjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjIf you are clueless about something  your teenager has shared with you ,ask questions, seek counsel about it.Don’t help your teen keep a deadly and harmful secret..i am not saying you should betray your child’s confidence, but there are some issues that you both will have to agree to seek external help for.


If you are being bullied in school, victimized or harassed in any way either by a teacher/lecturer,  a group, an individualvvvvvvvvv
Talk to your parent or loved one, don’t try to fight back on your own.
Bullying has caused some teenagers to join secret groups.

wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwIf you belong to any secret society, or you have been initiated into any kind of cult,  or you are been pressured to join a clique, a gang,  speak out and find help in God.


If you are confused about your sexual orientation. Or you have been introduced into homosexual-ism and lesbianism, please confide in a loved one or your pastor, and get help before it becomes a stronghold, and if it’s a lifestyle you have started already, you can be freed and your wholeness restored.jjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj

God made them “Adam and eve” not “Adam and Steve”


I encourage you to be brave,  you have a great future ahead you don’t have to remain a slave to secrets that cripple you each time you remember. talk to Jesus,  he loves you, he hears you. shalom. yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy


for questions ,prayers,and counseling,feel free to reach us



1. Romantic relationships could be demanding on your young and developing mind. It requires time, money, lots of emotional investments, attachments and responsibilities which could be draining and exhausting psychological, and socially for a teenager.

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1. Romantic relationships could be demanding on your young and developing mind. It requires time, money, lots of emotional investments, attachments and responsibilities which could be draining and exhausting psychological, and socially for a teenager.


Introducing Teens Aflame

Teens Aflame is a group of Christian medical practitioners and seasoned counselors who are  committed to offer professional help to teenagers as they go through growth development with reference and special attention to their physical, cognitive, emotional, social , and behavioral changes. Continue reading Introducing Teens Aflame